3 Reasons Why Being an Expat Can Be Hard

*Like finding a good brownie abroad, life can be hard.*

It Can Be Hard

Living the life of an expat is amazing and has some great perks. However, it’s not always glamorous and sometimes, it can be difficult. Here, I layout my top three reasons for why being an expat can be hard.

Missing Out on Events

In my opinion, the hardest thing about being away from your home country is missing out on big events. It’s wonderful to be able to celebrate with family and friends at things like weddings and births. It’s better to be around in person for a death. The problem is, living so far away has its restraints, no matter how much you try to plan.

Weddings

I can’t even name how many weddings I missed because I was unable to get back for them. Sometimes I can’t get the time off of work, other times I don’t have the money to make the short but quick trip, and sometimes, it’s just simply too far. It’s not always easy or cost-effective to fly out for a wedding on a Friday night, enjoy the wedding on Saturday, then fly again on Sunday. It can be hard to really enjoy it when you are jet lagged.

Births

Births are obviously much harder to plan for. Even if you have the money and are willing to make the long trek, you might miss out on things because you can’t fully predict the timing. It’s great to arrive after the birth, but it doesn’t compare to being present through the process, especially from someone who you are really close to but don't live near.

*I missed the birth but was able to make it for a visit a few weeks later.*

Deaths

Unfortunately, deaths and funerals are also missed. It’s not easy if there is an untimely death. It’s also hard if you have a loved one who is sick and know that time is coming but aren’t able to be with him or her. Technology has been a great tool but it definitely doesn’t compare to being there in person.

Homesickness

This second point goes hand in hand with my first point but takes it a little farther. Of course missing out on events can cause homesickness but other reasons cause it as well. Being away from a close family member or friend can allow homesickness to creep in every once in a while. It might not be an ongoing thing. It might just come and go, but it exists. Sometimes the comfort of a familiar culture causes homesickness. You just want to be able to jump in your car and drive to that grocery store you are comfortable with. Publix (https://www.publix.com/) anyone? Instead, you have to take the metro and navigate the language barrier to find that snack you’ve been craving, only to find out that this store doesn’t carry that oh so familiar snack.

*My favorite grocery store but doesn't exist outside the US.*

Always Being Treated Like a Tourist

My third point on the list is a little more dependent upon where you are an expat. Some places might feel a bit more like home because of similar cultures to your home country. Others might be completely foreign and just the way you look makes you stand out. Simply put, you are just treated differently like you are a 24/7 tourist.

This can ware on you because you know you live there and you just want to live your life and not be made to feel like you are there temporarily. You want to be treated like a local which means you want normal prices, you don’t want to be stared at, you don’t want to be offered tours, etc. When we move to a place that we want to call home (even if its just for a few years or so), we want it to feel like home, not like we are a tourist.

Final Thoughts On It Being Hard

There are many awesome experiences as an expat and it might sound like a glamorous and unattainable life to some. While it is true that it is great, one can't downplay the fact that it can be hard at times. Everyone's opinion is different on what makes it hard but for me, missing events, waves of homesickness, and not feeling quite at "home" in a different culture can all make the expat life difficult at times.